You are not Guilty.

Sometimes it is too easy to feel guilty about our shortcomings even in the place of prayer. We wonder whether God still loves us despite the nasty things we do or say. Sometimes our disappointment is with the fact that we expected more from ourselves. Well good news YOU ARE PLEASING TO GOD, Want to know why? It is because Jesus his son who is your intercessor is pleasing to God.

Put Jesus before your sin when you come to the place of prayer.You are sitted with Christ in high places, is Jesus pleasing to God? then you are pleasing to God. Did Jesus cast out demons then you can cast out demons. Did Jesus walk on water then you can walk on water. Did Jesus heal the sick then you can heal the sick.

Always come before God knowing that when he sees you he sees his son and the price he paid for you not your short comings.

 Stay blessed.

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The Illusion of Time. A tale of life’s individual race.

Life is beautiful and with it comes a journey. If we all focus on our journey and not look side ways or backwards, we will soon discover that we are all winners and no one is ever late. iniusoro

The Confident Woman.

My humble self volunteering for CancerAwareNg in 2017.

I know what it is to live in the 21st century, in the age of technology and social media. if you ask me what has held today’s young lady (woman) back from attaining her full potentials i will say confidence. Well that is my take on the cause of majority of the problems that plagues todays’ woman.

Today’s woman needs:

Confidence that transcends into making the right choices.

Confidence that transcends into the ability to pursue her dreams.

That allows her to walk out of bad relationships.

Confidence that translates into picking the right spouse.

Confidence that allows her to know it is ok to be alone.

Confidence that transcends into lifting other women up, rather than putting them down.

Confidence that transcends into faith in her God, in herself and in other women around her.

Confidence that transcends into knowing her worth.

Confidence that transcends into self love and appreciation.

I know what it is to live in the 21st century and confidence has taken me farther than I can ever imagine.

Related post

The Self Image of The 21st Century Woman

The 21st Century Hypocrite.

The 21st century hypocrite is simply someone who sees others through judgmental lenses and see themselves as always right and can do no wrong.

Isn’t it funny when people do things we consider immoral we frown at it and scold them vigorously maybe we even say some nasty things about them  and then several years later we do the same thing or we are doing the same thing but we use religion or morality to cloak ourselves  excusing our behavior.

Maybe its superiority complex, maybe you feel you are more entitled to make mistakes more than the next guy. Maybe its ok for us to be rude on the days we are angry but we can’t cut others some slack when they do same because you have an excuse and they don’t.

If we just look beyond what we see on the surface, will be less judgmental of those around us, recently I had an understanding of why Jesus  often scolded the Pharisees in the bible, they were essentially moralist on the surface but were also full of themselves, many often prided themselves on their ability to keep to rules and regulations which on its own is another form of pride.

Every day we encounter different people and due to race, religion and beliefs system we often categories people into what they can or can’t do, a black guy can say nigga but if a white man says the same thing they take offence, a woman can slap a man out of provocation but if a man does the same it’s called domestic violence.

I know equality and fairness in everything that pertains to life is a utopian dream but as much as possible practice what you preach .

How to Respect Yourself.

“Everyone should be respected as an individual, but no one idolised .” Albert Einstein

They say respect is reciprocal true, across all races, cultures, sex or age groups a desire for respect is common. We all want to be respected and valued but do we offer the people around us the same courtesy.

Here are five ways you could respect people and ultimately yourself.

(1) Respect  People’s Boundaries or Wishes.

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“Respect for ourselves guides our morals; respect for others guides our manners.” Laurence sterne

Having attended a boarding school and living in the hostel as a student in the university, one thing I have learnt is to give people their personal space, if someone says nobody should use my bucket or nobody should use my stuffs without my permission I think its sheer courtesy to actually obey their wishes, this does not mean you are afraid of them but rather that you are willing to make room for their wishes.

Some individuals do not like to be touched, everyone has boundaries especially when cohabiting with others whether it is being in a student hostel or living with your siblings, if someone says don’t wear my clothes, use or go through my things without my permission, respect their wishes.

(2) Don’t  Look Down on People

“I speak to everyone in the same way whether he is the garbage man or the president of the university.” Albert Einstein.

Everyone around you has a quota to contribute, someone has to drive you around (e.g. public transportation) and someone has to sell newspapers or deliver your mail. All these people are relevant to you because they supply your needs in form of Goods and services. You being a managing director or CEO does not mean you should look down on others within or outside where you work.

“A person is a person no matter how small.” Dr Seuss

It’s too easy to feel you are better than the next person, when you see people who are not up to your standard, how do you treat them, do you treat them with disdain or respect. It’s true there can be no equal society but there are equal rights and everyone is entitled to a little respect.

 (3) Don’t Intimidate People

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No one likes to be bullied, for example when you intimidate people especially in a work place environment, what you are saying is the people who you work with or supervise are incompetent and incapable of doing their work unless you push them around like puns on a chess board. And sometimes intimidating people comes from a place of deep insecurity where you believe to get respect you have to be intimidating to others. This behavior does not show value or respect for those around you be it friends, family or co-workers.

(4) Don’t Manipulate People

Everyone likes to be the smartest guy in the room but being the smartest guy in the room doesn’t mean you should use it to hurt others. There are different kinds of manipulations, some use tears and emotions to get people to do what they want, others use tricky and the list is endless. If you want something come out straight and ask for it, no one wants to be used. And if you are rejected, walk away like an honourable person.

(5) Respecting Peoples Opinion or Choices.

“Have a big enough heart to love unconditionally, and a broad enough mind to embrace the difference that make each of us unique.”  D.B Harrop

Everyone has a right to his or her opinion; one of the greatest forms of respect is to see the next human as rational and capable of having their own belief system. Am not saying you have to agree with what they believe in but when you tear down people for their views you demoralize them, rather if you have an argument with the way someone around you acts or the things they believe in, just present your case to them and if they don’t listen let them be.

If we value ourselves we ought to value others, as much as possible present and conduct your-self in a manner worthy of respect, irrespective of your social status, gender, religion,race or culture.

Thanks for reading this post, if there are other ways people do not show respect feel free to leave a comment and contribute to this post

you can also read my post on LOVING YOURSELF.

 

10 Relationship lessons to imbibe in 2018.

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1). Relationship books can serve as guiding systems but they don’t answer all relationship questions.

 

2). Relationships do not cure all forms of loneliness; you have to sort that yourself.

 

3). No matter how knowledgeable you are in the area of relationship you will still have lapses you have to work on.

Continue reading “10 Relationship lessons to imbibe in 2018.”

Feeling stuck? 8 ways to renew your mind


Sometimes I wonder why I learn something and after a while of trying to incorporate it into my life I give up. I realized that to win in life persistence is necessary. You have to constantly renew you minds with positive thoughts. I attend  seminars and read several self-help books on determination, discipline, emotional stability etc. but somehow each time I hit a road block in practicing what I have learnt I give up and say these things are only realistic in books, cliché right?

PERSONAL GROWTH

personal-growth
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They say change is the only constant thing in life, whether we like it or not as the years go by change occurs in our lives from changes in our attitude towards life, to changes in how we relate with the people around us, change must occur. It is left for the individual to change positively or negatively.

Growing physically, emotionally and mentally can be hard as it takes conscious investment of time, money etc. There are many people who would love to change the way they live, exercise more, lose weight, read more, be more ambitious and effecient at work but what we don’t know is change can be hard and  will always meet a resistance. Take for example when trying to start a healthy lifestyle practice like exercising, your body resist this new change, you feel pain and aches in your joints and muscles. If you persist despite the pain in one to two weeks depending on your body you get accustomed to the pain or you don’t feel it at all.

ENTREPRENEURSHIP

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entrepreneurcoach.com

In pursuing goals in entrepreneurship you need to take some risk, step out and try some new things. Taking risk doesn’t necessarily have to involve billions of dollars rather it’s about stepping out in courage and seeing opportunities where others see road blocks.

I once started a business in my environment though it seemed at first that the possible market for the product was non-existent .I went ahead and started the business with fingers crossed and money that I had invested at stake, I started telling people about the product and to my amazement to response was   incredible and I made a lot of profit from that venture till date the product is still in high demand.

Being an entrepreneur takes faith in yourself and what you believe in. During the time I encountered several challenges like people who didn’t like the product, critics who felt the business would flop.

Here are:

8 WAYS TO CONSISTENTLY RENEW YOUR MIND

  1. Write down your beliefs on a board or a journal, it is said that writing goals and ambitions down makes you more likely to work towards them.
  2. Whenever you meet a resistance, always go back to you board or journal.
  3. Do not accept defeat easily, persistence is key.
  4. Attitude is everything. Your attitude towards the events that occur in your life matter more than you think. A positive attitude can change the outcome of a bad event.
  5. Surround yourself with people who believe in the same things as you e.g. In trying to be better at saving money surrounding yourself with people who are prudent about spending money and who you are accounted to, it will keep you grounded.
  6. Expect that there will be down days and there will be days of victory
  7. Don’t put pressure on yourself, in whatever you do move at your own pace (except when there is a deadline)
  8. Re-evaluate your goals and ambitions from time to time, this allows you to see how well you are doing and where you need to make adjustments.

The mind is a very powerful tool, as much as possible discipline yourself to think only positive thoughts.

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Twitter: @bennyini

True Satisfaction: How to get all your needs met.

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Life is full of many treasures and acquiring them has always been man’s goal, the main reason why we pursue these treasures (cars, houses, relationships etc) is because they come with promises of making us happy. But do they really make us happy?

 

Take delight in the lord and he will give you your heart’s desires. Psalm 37:4

Some of us might have experienced situations where everything is great in our lives our bills are paid, we have food to eat, good clothes to wear. we probably just acquired something we have always wanted but for a split moment we realize that we feel empty and it’s like there is a huge hole in our hearts that needs filling and most of us  go out of our way to get things and people to feel that vacuum. 

For single guys or ladies they may decide that the vacuum is caused by a lack of an intimate relationship in their lives and hence you hear statements like I feel incomplete, but before long they find out that people and things can never complete us only God can.

 

 Come everyone who thirsts, come to the water; and he who has no money, come, buy and  eat! Come; buy wine and milk without money and without price. Isaiah 55:1

Remember the Samaritan woman who had been married five times and was co-habiting with a man, what exactly was she looking for? Take a good guess, fulfillment! She was looking for something no human, man or woman could give her and that’s why Jesus offered her living water so that she would thirst no more. Jesus recognized her need, she was thirsty for completion and satisfaction and Jesus offered it to her.

My victory and honor from God alone. He is my refuge, a rock where no enemy can reach me.       Psalm 62:7

Achievements are great but they don’t give everlasting satisfaction, many times I have found myself striving to get a lot of things a new phone, dress , top grades and when I do get these things am happy for a while and then I discover that something else is bothering me and tries to steal my happiness. But my happiest moment have been at times where I have great fellowship with God such that no matter what is happening in my life I have peace within me because I no God is my source and that his love for me never fails.

But whoever drinks of the water that I will give him will never be thirsty again. The water that I will give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.  John 4:14

And that how the cookie crumbles people, nothing can give you everlasting happiness, only God can fill that large vacuum in our lives because it’s so big you need something greater than the vacuum to fill it.

 

 

 

How Pain Helps Us Evolve

“My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations; knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience.james1:2”

Pain is an excruciating feeling, there are different kinds of pain, the pain of watching a loved one battle with a chronic illness like cancer, the pain of failing after trying so hard, the pain of a break up or divorce. Some events carry more pain than others; pain has the ability to put the human spirit down but in the end if we can overcome them we come out victorious.

Watching an episode of one of my favorite TV series the Big Bang Theory one of the series character Sheldon cooper made an insightful statement “pain is evolutionary. Many people would testify that pain teaches us more things than we can hope for; people have risen from failure, poverty and all kinds of pain to become better people. Remember suffering also builds character

Like a little child learning what is good and bad, pain teaches even the immature what to avoid, imagine a child that touches a hot object and withdraws from the pain the child learns to not touch such object in future. Humans as a race have used disease outbreaks, famine and natural disasters to improve the choices they make and protect themselves from such disasters.

Even the bible teaches us to rejoice even in pain,

“My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations; knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience.james1:2”
SIX WAYS PAIN HELPS PEOPLE EVOLVE

 

1) We have seen many artist perform better when they feel hurt, Taylor swift sings better songs each time she is heartbroken, same goes for Adele and many other successful artist

2) ln business adversity helps you become a better entrepreneur, you learn what risks to take and which ones to avoid.

3) In relationships no matter how painful breakups might be they tell us what we are doing wrong and how to adjust ourselves to become better partners.

4) In academics, failing a course can be devastating but if you stay strong and focused you would discover your areas of weakness and use it to improve yourself.

5) In personal growth, pain and suffering helps you become more aware of yourself and your environment.

6) In sports, athletics or anything worth pursuing in life the pain of failure and rejection has helped people realign their purpose and what matters most to them.

Pain is only useful as a tool towards success and personal development when it is channeled into positive energy but pain also has negative outcomes such as alcohol abuse, depression and anger. Life should be pleasing and full of joy but sometimes we face pain, sadness and rejection, what we chose to do with these feelings is what matters the most.

Stay blessed.

​I WAS MADE FOR MORE!

For I know the thoughts I think towards you, thoughts of good and peace, not of evil, to give you an expected end. Jeremiah 29:11

I was made for more.

I   was made for more than acquiring luxury.

I was made for more than marriage.

I was made for more than obtaining degrees.

I was made for an assignment.

The creature earnestly awaits my manifestation.

I am a letter sent from heaven.

The world is eager to read me.

I will not be a closed, hidden letter.

I shall be read on the hills.

I shall illuminate my world.

I was made for a greater purpose.

I was made for more.